My Conflicted Thoughts on the Night of Tisha B'Av

It is almost midnight on Tisha B’Av, the saddest day on the Jewish calendar. On Tisha B’Av, we mark the destruction of both the First and Second Temple and a host of other tragic events that have occurred to the Jewish people.

This Tisha B’Av is different than others I have experienced. This Tisha B’Av, Israel is at war and anti-Semitism is once again rearing its ugly head. These two things are, sadly, not new or unique, nor is the crazy lack of understanding from the outside world. It is the convergence of these events on Tisha B’Av that heighten my awareness of it all.

From FreeImages.com  anatlevi8

On Tisha B’Av, Jews actively express our longing for the Temple. This yearning is about more than just the building, it’s a yearning for a time of religious clarity and spiritual strength and a hope that soon there will be a final redemption that leads to a world of peace and Divine awareness. This is the concept of Moshiach - the messiah.

The straight-shooting fact of the matter is that when it comes to the idea of Moshiach, I am a bit of a coward. I deeply desire to live in a world of peace, order, stability and true respect for all of God’s creation. On the other hand, the idea of such drastic change is terrifying.

More than one friend or acquaintance has said to me in the last few weeks that the trauma we are experiencing now are the birth-pangs of new world. I guess that is what has me mulling over what this signifies to me. There is a hope inside me, certainly – which must be why I keep wishing to hesitate from setting any long range plans, after all the world may be changing in just a few hours! But much of this hope is tempered by my fear of change, my lack of faith and my clinging grip to the pattern of same old-same old.

A part of me whom I don’t want to admit to wants to shout, “Moshiach can’t come, I have plans. I want to go on vacation next week.” Today I noticed the van of a family whom I know are moving out of Montreal in a few weeks, and it made me think about living a Jewish life requires one to live in two realities. There is the reality of hope, the one that yearns for Moshiach (and the one who recognizes that this family would have it great if Moshiach came right now as they are already packed!) and the reality of living. One cannot put off life decisions because the Jewish people might earn the right to redemption.

It is a fine line between these two realities, and the true challenge is finding the balance between them. Looking at the headlines in my Facebook stream, even when I know that most of which I see come from right wing propaganda sights, it is difficult not to believe that the only way out of this mess if for Moshiach to come – otherwise we, meaning Israel, will be left with the (undeserved) scorn of the world. On the other hand, fighting in Israel has happened before, and the world didn’t change so why would it this time?

The truth is, I know where I want to be. I have always wanted to possess true emunah and bitachon (belief and faith), but it is a struggle for me. I want to want Moshiach to come like nothing I have ever wanted, and there are brief moments where I can tap into that emotion.

I am writing these thoughts for my own benefit, but also as a comfort to any and all of my friends who feel challenged by these seemingly opposing influences. Tomorrow, when I wake, it will still be Tisha B’Av. I cannot say what the morning will bring, but I hope that I can find a way to make my fast meaningful in such a way as to connect me to a better understanding of the greatness that we lost when we lost the Holy Temple.

Finding Meaning In Tragedy

Originally published on Times of Israel.

This has been a difficult week for the Jewish people. It was nearly impossible not to be touched by the plight of the three missing Israeli boys and not to then feel heartbroken to learn that they had been killed.

Like many mothers and fathers who followed the unfolding story, my first instinct upon hearing the news was to hug and to hold my children. This, on one hand, was a selfish act and, on the other hand, an act meant to express solidarity with the now grieving parents.

Last Friday night, my eight year old daughter joined me for lighting Shabbat candles. We each spent a few extra moments praying for the three boys. Afterward, as we finished setting the table, we got into a deep conversation about belief in God that evolved into my explaining that just because we ask for something doesn’t mean we are going to get it. I was drawn back to the devastating events twenty years ago when Nachshon Wachsman, z”l, was kidnapped and murdered. His parents’ response was to say to the world that they should not despair that all of the prayers and all of the mitzvot had been in vain. Rather, they declared with the greatest faith that God had heard their prayers, but that the answer to their request had been no. It was a powerful declaration of faith. My daughter listened to what I had to say and seemed to understand the complex concepts I was mentioning.

The news that the bodies of the three boys had been found reached me while we were on vacation. At what I felt was an appropriate time, I called this child over and said, simply, “Honey, God said no.” She blinked and said, “The boys?” I nodded and told her they were dead and then moved the conversation along after giving her a firm hold.

When I read more and learned that the entire time we had been praying and rallying and hoping, the boys were already beyond a miracle, I wondered if I should say something more to my daughter. God cannot undo a fait-accompli, so perhaps I had given her the wrong explanation in telling her that God had said no to our prayers since, by the time the global Jewish community found out, it was tragically too late. At the same time, I did not want her to ever think that praying is ever a vain act.

For the past two days, my mind keeps returning to this tragedy. Tonight it occurred to me that this week’s parasha is parashat Balak, which is all about curses being turned into blessings. Balaam hated the Israelites, so when he was hired by Balak, the king of the Moab, to curse the Children of Israel, his enthusiasm was based on his own personal desire to do so. Try as he might to curse them, however, each utterance that came out of his mouth was a blessing.

What does this have to do with the terrible events of this week? It is the fact that Balaam is a prototype of our enemies. They thirst to destroy the Jewish people. Their acts may cause us pain, but they also bring us strength. Three and a half weeks ago, before the kidnapping, I followed much of the news from Israel tangentially and said the morning prayer service only on the rare mornings when the time presented itself to me. When I heard about the kidnapping, I sought out the news, I cried from a sense of connectedness with my fellow Jews, and I made the time to say the prayers.

Balaam’s most famous blessing has been demonstrated once again. “How glorious are your tents, Jacob, your dwellings, Israel” (Numbers 24:5). No matter where we set up our homes, we are one people. No matter how many differences we have to “discuss” among ourselves, we are one nation.

There are calls for revenge, that is inevitable, but the vast array of responses are tearful reflections on what could be done to make the world better. Most simply put, it seems to me that even as this is not the first such horrible event, the Jewish people cannot comprehend how any human beings can act with such utter cruelty.

The parasha of Balak concludes with a lesson that is very difficult to process. The wicked who hate the Jewish people will not desist just because they fail to destroy us. When Balaam’s curses failed, he tried to lure the Israelites into immoral behavior that he knew would lead to the Israelite’s downfall. Sadly, many succumbed, but many more stayed strong.

The enemies of the Jewish people today would like little more than to see us sink to their levels of unmitigated violence, but if we do so we are berated by world opinion. Time and again we choose the moral high ground, which is not always the easiest path.

It is impossible to understand a mind set that can condone the murder of schoolboys, and it is harder still to see the kidnappers being hailed and honored as heroes.

On the other hand, when you see the tens of thousands of Jews who have rallied to support and give strength to the suffering families, I truly see how goodly the tents of Jacob remain to this day.

Understanding Sinai

Originally published on Huffington Post

This is the week when Jews are meant to go back to Mount Sinai. Not literally, of course (especially as there is a debate over exactly where Mount Sinai is), but spiritually. During the celebration of Shavuot, the Jewish people are meant to connect with the significance of the giving of the Torah to the Children of Israel. These Ten Commandments are the building blocks of Jewish life, Jewish law and the civilization that the Torah intends the Jewish people to build.

Oddly enough, the narrative of what occurred at Mount Sinai is not one of the better-known biblical stories. Perhaps, because it is overshadowed by the unfortunate event that happened shortly thereafter...that whole incident with the golden calf.

In order to receive the Torah, the Jewish people were instructed to prepare themselves for three days. They bathed, washed their clothes and refrained from overt physical pleasures. They tried to focus on the event to come. It was a time of incredible excitement and incredible stress. It was so stressful that the Midrash reports that the Jewish people overslept on the morning of the day they were to receive the Torah! (Imagine when you prepare so hard for an event that you forget the little details, like setting an alarm clock.)

On the third morning, a thick cloud covered the mountain and there was thunder and lightning. The Israelites gathered around the small mountain that trembled under the strain of the Divine presence that had descended upon it. And then God spoke the Ten Commandments to the people.

Actually, according to the Midrash, only the first two of the Commandments were spoken aloud by God (Talmud Maakot 24a). This experience alone was overwhelming enough for the Israelites, and they begged Moses to receive the rest of the commandments for them.

The Israelites were overwhelmed by the voice of God, but there is significance to the fact that only the first two commandments were heard by the nation directly from God. These two commandments are: 'I am the Lord your God Who took you out of Egypt' and 'You shall have no other Gods before me."

How can a verse such as "I am the Lord your God" be included in the Ten Commandments if it does not contain an action. Guard Shabbat, Honor your parents, Don't steal...these are commandments that one can readily understand. What is it, exactly, that the verse "I am the Lord your God" is commanding?

Jewish tradition understands that the words "I am" (Anochi) implies the command "to know." One is meant to know, in his/her heart and mind, that there is a God and that God is the omnipresent Creator of all things in the universe.

It is interesting to note that, according to the Sefer Hachinuch, "I am the Lord your God" is one of only six commandments that can, and should, be performed at all times and in all places.

"I am the Lord your God" is at once one of the easiest and one of the most difficult commandments to fulfill. What makes it difficult is that humankind naturally prefers to credit itself for the good (and bad) found in the world. At its most basic, this mitzvah is fulfilled by simply believing in God. The more desirable way to fulfill this mitzvah, however, is to try and see God's hand in one's life all day, every day.

"I am the Lord your God" as seen as the fundamental commandment to see the Divine in all actions allows for a different perspective on the rest of the Ten Commandments (indeed, the rest of the Torah). According to the sages, the first five commandments concern one's relationship with God. The second five are concerned with interpersonal relationships. Strikingly, these two sets of five parallel each other and demonstrate how "I am the Lord Your God is reflected in one's personal and public life:

1) I am the Lord your God and 6) Do not murder: When someone murders another person, the perpetrator, in effect, denies that the victim is created b'tzelem Eh'lokim, made in the image of God. A murderer assumes that there is no higher power who will either punish him/her or who will punish the person whom he/she feels has wronged him/her.

2) You shall have no idols and 7) Do not commit adultery: Just as adultery is being unfaithful to one's spouse, worshiping idols is tantamount to being unfaithful to God.

3) Do not make a false oath and 8) Do not steal: One who swears falsely in God's name distorts the trust that people place in God to uphold justice. One who steals twists the trust another person puts in him/her.

4) Sanctify the Sabbath and 9) Do not bear false witness: By sanctifying the Sabbath day, one bears testimony that God created the world and redeemed the Jews from Egypt. Violating the Sabbath denies both.

5) Honor your mother and father and 10) Do not covet your neighbor's possessions: By honoring our parents, we recognize God as our Creator, thereby honoring Him as well. When we covet our neighbor's possessions we deny God as the Ruler of the world and believe that we have been denied something that we deserve.

Shavuot, the holiday that commemorates the giving of the Torah, begins at sunset on Tuesday night, June 3. To learn more about Shavuot, please visit NJOP's Shavuot Essentials page. To learn more about each of the Ten Commandments, download (for Free) Jewish Treats Guide to the Ten Commandments.

10 Fascinating Facts About The Ten Commandments (The Movie)

Originally published on Huffington Post

Watching Paramount's The Ten Commandments is, for many, an annual part of the spring holidays. While there have been other film versions of the story of the exodus, none have the epic staying power of the 1956 classic. Indeed, many have now grown up with the image of Charlton Heston irreparably set as the image of Moses.

Bringing a bible story to the big screen often warrants certain liberties. In the case of The Ten Commandments, this meant the introduction of a love story between Moses and Nefretiri, a power struggle between Moses and the young Ramses and the creation of Lilia, the love interest of Joshua.

Surprisingly, many of the places Cecil B. DeMille appears to have gotten creative are actually based on extra-Biblical Jewish sources:

1 ) Moses, Conquerer of Ethiopia
The grown-up Moses is introduced in The Ten Commandments when he returns to Pharoah after bringing Ethiopia into alliance with Egypt. There is no record of Moses conquering Ethiopia on behalf of Pharaoh. However, there is a Midrash (narrative from the Oral Torah) that details how, after fleeing Egypt, Moses went to Ethiopia and was named king. This occurred before he came to the tent of Jethro, where he married and became a shepherd.

2) The Day of Moses
In trying to instigate trouble for Moses, Prince Ramses tells his father (Pharaoh Sethi) that Moses not only gave the Hebrew slaves extra grain, but one day in seven to rest, a day that the Hebrews now called "the Day of Moses." While the reference to the "Day of Moses" is a little over the top on drama, it is true, according to the Midrash (Exodus Rabbah 1:28), that Moses convinced Pharoah to give the Jews a day of rest each week. He did so by noting that Pharoah gave his horses time to rest, so why not his slaves.

3) The Evil Dathan
The vile Dathan, played by Edward G. Robinson, is one of the most memorable and unlikable characters in the movie. Dathan and his brother Aviram, who is mostly a silent presence in the movie, appear repeatedly in the Torah as troublemakers. In Egypt, Dathan was an Israelite overseer. Rather than Joshua being the Israelite whose life Moses saves by killing the Egyptian taskmaster, as presented in the movie, there is a Midrash that implies that this was Dathan's story (in the Midrash he is referred to only as the Hebrew). One night, Dathan's Egyptian boss sent him out on assignment and went into his home. In the dark, the Egyptian pretended to be the man and had relations with his beautiful wife (Shelomit). When the man let the taskmaster know that he knew what had happened, the Egyptian began to strike him.

The next day, Moses tried to intercede when Dathan and Aviram are fighting. Dathan is the one whom the Torah quotes as saying: "Will you kill me as you killed the Egyptian?" (Exodus 1:29).

4) The Known Redeemer
In the movie, Prince Ramses is set on finding the foretold redeemer of the Hebrew slaves. With information from Dathan, he is led to Moses, whom he presents to Pharoah Sethi as the one whom they have sought. Unable to kill Moses, who is like a son to him, Pharoah Sethi commands that Moses' name be stricken from all records and that he be sent into exile. In fact, Exodus 2:15 clearly states that "When Pharaoh heard this thing [Moses killed an Egyptian], he sought to slay Moses. But Moses fled..."

5) Muslims in Midian
Jethro and his seven daughters are subtly presented as followers of an Islam-like faith. They claim Ishmael as their forefather and state that Ishmael was the son brought to the mountain as a sacrifice to God. While Jethro is portrayed in the Midrash as a man who tried a wide variety of religions and who was serving as a priest in Midian when Moses met him, he is never associated with Islam -- perhaps because Islam developed hundreds of years later. Even if one were to assume that he was part of a pre-Islamic tribe descended from Ishmael, this would be false because the Midianites were descendants of Abraham and Keturah (his wife after Sarah) and not from Ishmael.

6) Joshua Makes Moses Move
Throughout the movie, Joshua is a bigger-than-life, hunky hero. He's a stonecutter in Egypt who stands up to Dathan, a protector of the elderly Joshabel (meant to be Jochebed) and, most significantly, the man who spurs Moses forward on his search to understand who he is. Alas, none of these instances have any foundation. There is no record of Joshua suddenly appearing in Midian and pushing Moses to go seek God on the mountain. Perhaps this was meant to reflect the biblical account of Aharon coming from Egypt to meet Moses in the wilderness. However, this took place only after Moses had agreed to go and lead the Israelites out of slavery.

7) Hey, That Bush is on Fire
Speaking of the mountain, it appears that everyone in the region can see something special about it. A dark cloud hovers over it at all times, and it is referred to as God's mountain. Additionally, Tzipporah and Joshua tell Moses about the bush that is on fire but does not burn. According to Jewish tradition, Moses did not deliberately go to find God on a known holy mountain with a burning bush visible to others. The biblical text states "Now Moses kept the flock of Jethro his father-in-law, the priest of Midian: and he led the flock to the backside of the desert, and came to the mountain of God, even to Horeb" (Exodus 3:1). According to the Midrash, he found the burning bush when he was following one stray sheep to make certain it was returned to its flock.

8) Korach the High Priest
By the end of the movie it appears that the film-makers just wanted to include as many Bible stories as possible. Once the golden calf is made, Dathan takes charge. He declares Korach the high-priest and debauchery and chaos ensue. It is true that Korach was a Levite who wished to be the High Priest and led a rebellion against Moses and Aharon.  It is also true that Dathan was one of Korach's prime supporters in the rebellion. However, the events of Korach's rebellion are recorded in the Book of Numbers and took place elsewhere. The story of Korach is additionally misapproprated when the ground opens up and swallows the unrepentant worshippers of the golden calf. This is actually another piece of the story of Korach. The Torah clearly relates that those who chose the calf over God were slain by the swords of the Levites.

9) One Man Struck Down
In a small but fascinatingly accurate incident in the movie, one man cries out against the licentious worship of the golden calf. Another man comes from behind and strikes him down, presumably killing him. This was not added as random violence but is a reference to the death of Hur, the son of Miriam and Caleb, that is presented in Talmud Sanhedrin 7a: "Rabbi Benjamin ben Japhet says, reporting Rabbi Eleazar: He [Aharon] saw Hur lying slain before him and said [to himself]: If I do not obey them, they will now do unto me as they did unto Hur... Better let them worship the golden calf, for which offence they may yet find forgiveness through repentance."

10) Moses Final Words
The final scene of The Ten Commandments has Moses saying goodbye to a small group of significant characters. After commanding Joshua to be strong leader and to have faith, he presents a copy of the Torah to Eleazar to place in the ark and than tells all those gathered (and perhaps the crowd far below) "Go, proclaim liberty throughout all the lands, unto all the inhabitants thereof!" Beautiful as this verse is, it is actually a reference to the celebration of the jubilee year and comes from the 25th chapter of Leviticus. If it is a quote that you recognize, it is also inscribed on the Liberty Bell.

In Quebec, A Taste of Redemption

Originally published on Times of Israel

Like many Jews at this time of year, I’ve been busy preparing for Passover. There’s the usual cleaning, wondering what we will eat (I’ve threatened chicken and mashed potatoes every night) and keeping the household peaceful with my children off from school.

Because I live in Quebec, however, this year’s Passover preparations have had a whole new dimension. The Hagaddah tells us that “In every generation they rise against us to annihilate us…”

This year, the Jews of Quebec saw just how true this could be. Over the last year and a half, after the Parti Québécois (PQ) was elected into office, the primary legislative concern in the province appeared to be the creation and passing of a Charter of Values. While the term Charter of Values sounds positive, the real meaning was legislation to suppress religious freedom. The values being promoted were a combination of forced secularism and xenophobia, as certain Christian symbols were being redefined as Quebec heritage.

In the course of my life, I’ve had a few run-ins with anti-Semitism, but until this year, I don’t think I every worried that the society in which I was living might turn against me and my people. The most publicized issue of the Charter was the ban on religious symbols such as kippot/yarmulka and scarves. The ban was meant to affect only those who worked for the government, but as the government oversees the medical system, the educational system (and the religious schools do receive some government grants for secular studies that make their tuition more affordable) and a host of other industries that one might expect to be independent…it would have affected a large swath of the population.

With each passing week, it seemed as if the xenophobes we’re gaining power. Other political parties seemed frightened to fully criticize the Charter, afraid to look weak to the Charter’s supporters. The newspapers began reporting incidents of harassment to individuals in religious garb (granted the majority of these incidents involved Muslim women in hijabs). Only weeks before the election, I even heard that the Premiere had said that private business would also be allowed to fire employees who wore religious symbols.

Some Jews chose to move. Many of us held our breath, prayed hard and checked our passports, silently hoping that we weren’t following in the footsteps of the pre-war European Jews who thought that the Nazis were a fluke. After all, a surprising number of people appeared to support this Charter.

Thank God, this past Monday, the PQ was overwhelmingly defeated in a provincial election. There were several reasons that the PQ was ousted from power, and I cannot say for certain that this was a vote against the Charter rather than a reaction to bad economic policy and calls for separation. However, the very fact that the Liberals are now in power means that the province can move forward and away from xenophobia. The threat has been alleviated.

On Monday evening, my husband came home from voting to find me cleaning out the cupboard and getting ready for Passover. He left shortly thereafter to post better directions to the polling booth, so that no vote would be missed, and left again after dinner to drive some neighbors to the voting station.

That night, as the results began to come in, I could not help but think about the fact that this important vote took place a week before Passover. It was a moment (albeit minor in the scope of Jewish history) of redemption for the province’s Jews. Had the PQ won, I knew several people who were thinking of leaving. Had the Charter passed, it is hard to say what would have happened to the Jewish community. And it would have been a shame if the Jews left Quebec, where Jews have lived since 1700s. The modern Jewish community is a vibrant combination of Jews from all walks of life and of incredibly diverse backgrounds.

Following the election, Jews throughout Quebec thanked God for the results and rejoiced over the change of government. Next week, when we sit at our seders and recite Hallel, the Psalms that praise God, we will all, no doubt, have in mind a special sense of gratitude.

The Difference between Settling and Dwelling, as Reflected by Next Week’s Holidays

Originally published on Times of Israel.

Have you ever heard the question: are you a Jewish American or an American Jew? As an English major, I always enjoyed thinking about how the subtle shift in syntax changes the meaning of the phrase. The question, of course, is which word a person uses an adjective and which as a noun. Am I an American who is Jewish or a Jew who is American?

It is a question of mind-frame, about where you are and where you are going. The Torah (Genesis 37:1) states: “Vayeishev Yaakov, and Jacob settled”…and one of the best known commentaries on this verse is that this was an error on Jacob’s part. You see, previously, the patriarchs had always been described as dwelling (or sojourning), implying that they were ready to continue with either or both their physical and spiritual journeys. The commentaries say that everything that happened to Jacob (particularly losing Joseph) was because he “settled,” he became complacent.

Next week, Jews in America will celebrate two holidays, Chanukah and Thanksgiving. Now before I say anything further, let me be clear that I am an ardent practitioner of both.

This year, that celebration has been dubbed Thanksgivukkah – a once-in-a-lifetime holiday for American Jews. But this new celebration makes me pause. Is my identity as an American and as a Jew so intertwined that I have to merge these two celebrations? I want my deep fried donuts and I want my turkey, but that does not mean I want a deep fried turkey.

Most years, Jews have to struggle to remember that Chanukah isn’t the Jewish Christmas. It’s hard to deny that Christmas doesn’t look like a lot of fun to celebrate, but Chanukah bushes and tinselly blue and white decorations have no connection to the holiday. They only send a message that there is something to add to the celebration of Chanukah, as if there is a lack of something…and the same goes for Thanksgivukkah (and yes, most of what I see is adding Thanksgiving to Chanukah, not Chanukah to Thankgiving).

This is the question of settling or dwelling. When one has settled into a place, one begins to absorb the ways and mores of the surrounding people. When one has the attitude of sojourning, or living temporarily (even long-term temporarily) one has a stronger will to maintain one’s unique identity.

The question of identity might be more pressing to me as an American Jew now living in Montreal, Quebec. For those not familiar with the situation, the nationalist party that is currently in power feels that they must assert a homogenous provincial culture. Currently in the legislature is something being referred to as the “Charter of Values,” which basically declares that employees of any business that accepts any government funding (including hospitals, schools, etc.) may not wear religious symbols – kippa/yarmulka, head scarf, cross, etc. At the same time, they are smiling and saying that Quebec is a place that encourages freedom and diversity! Suddenly, I relate a little more strongly to the cause of the Maccabees.

The Maccabees fought against a dominant culture that wished to absorb them, that said, at first, we’re okay with you Jews doing your own thing…but maybe you should do it more like us, and a little more, and still more. In the days of the Maccabees, there were many Jews who had stopped celebrating Jewish life altogether because of the subtle pressure of the society around them…and that was before the Syrian-Greeks began imposing oppressive measures.

Perhaps you are now thinking that it is a bit of a stretch to say that making a Thanksgivukkah celebration is going to lead Jews to assimilating themselves off the demographic map. That is not my point. My point is that my family will enjoy a delicious meal of turkey and stuffing and go around the table noting that for which we are grateful – right after we light the menorah and sing Maoz Tzur and remind ourselves (and those around us who see the menorah lit in the window) of the miracles God performed for the Jews who fought against their way of life beig diluted by the culture of others.

Are You A Kind Person

Originally published on Times of Israel.

In honor of “World Kindess Day,” let me ask you a question. Are you a kind person?

It’s a funny sort of question, and one which I would guess most people don’t frequently ask themselves. We grow up being taught about doing good deeds and being nice to others, and, for the most part, we integrate these concepts in our lives, but do we ever really think about what it means to be kind?

If I were to ask you right now to give me an example of an act of kindness, what would you say? For many people, the go-to answer is making charitable contributions. After all, kindness is about giving something of oneself to help another, and the most obvious way to do this is financially. But while charity is an extremely important and virtuous activity, it says in the Talmud that “Acts of kindness are greater than charity, for it is said (Hosea 1:12), ‘Sow to yourself according to your charity, but reap according to your kindness.’ If a person sows, it is doubtful whether he will eat or not, but when a person reaps he will certainly eat it” (Sukkah 49b).

The sages go on to explain that in three ways kindness is better than charity: (1) Kindness can be done with one’s person and one’s money, as opposed to charity, which can only be done with money. (2) Kindness can be done for any person, rich or poor. (3) Kindness can be done for both the living and the dead.

Acts of kindness, known in Hebrew as gemilut chasadim, are critical not only to a happy society, but to the very existence of the world. It says in the Mishna that gemilut chasadim is one of the three pillars sustaining the world, along with Torah and service to God (Pirkei Avot/Ethics of the Fathers 1:2).

Imagine a society where no one takes the time to be kind to one another. It would be an extremely selfish society in which everyone focussed only on their own welfare. Indeed, according to the Midrash, one such society did exist…it was the city of Sodom. A different Mishna in Pirkei Avot lists 4 types of people:

1) The ignorant person says “what’s mine is mine and what’s your is yours;”

2) The saintly person says “what’s mine is yours and what’s your is your own;”

3) The wicked person says “what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine;”

4) The person who says “what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is yours,” is said by some to be of the attitude of Sodom.

The city of Sodom, which was destroyed by God in the days of Abraham (Genesis 19), was known as an evil city. One might therefore believe that it was full of thieves, but, actually, it was full of people who took absolutely no interest in the people around them and were uninvolved with the community at large. Theirs was a society that was not a society, it was an assortment of people living near each other and only focussing on themselves and their own needs as individuals.

While kindness is about helping other people, it is also about interacting positively with one another. There are many ways in which a person can perform acts of kindness. Some of the best-known mitzvot associated with acts of kindness are: visiting the sick, welcoming guests, and helping a bride and groom. Many of us, however, don’t always have opportunities to visit the sick, welcome guests or help a couple just starting out. But there are regular opportunities throughout the day for kindness that are often overlooked:

1) During one’s commute, simple acts such as holding the door open for the person behind you or thanking the person who held the door for you (even if you’re on the phone), helping a parent with a stroller go up or down subway stairs, or holding the elevator door when you hear the telltale footsteps of someone hurrying to make it.

2) Throughout the day at work, one can show kindness by helping a co-worker with a project, grabbing a coffee for a busy colleague or making certain to compliment a job well done.

3) And of course, kindness is always welcome at home. Home is actually the perfect place to implement one of the ideas of the World Kindness Movement, which is that one needs to do acts of kindness for oneself. This may mean buying flowers to make one’s home feel warm or taking ten minutes of “me time.” If one lives with other people, then kindness is a natural partner to being conscientious – wash the extra dishes, pay attention when being told about someone else’s day, etc.

There is one act of kindness that one can do at all times and in almost all situations. The simple act of smiling at another person is an act of kindness. The Talmud states, “The man who shows his teeth [smiles] is better than one who gives milk to drink” (Ketubot 101b).

Being kind cannot be limited to one day a year, but having World Kindness Day is a wonderful reminder of the kindesses we can do every day.

So stop reading this article and smile pleasantly at the next person that you see.

(For more on acts of kindness, visit Jewish Treats.)